The Choice To Change Blog


Showing posts with label London Counsellors. Show all posts
Showing posts with label London Counsellors. Show all posts

Monday, 17 December 2012

Why Dissolving Your Fears Are Crucial To Your Success

I was watching the Big Bang Theory the other day...


Normally I loved this show to bits... the characters are so funny, so human, and the situations (plus Sheldon... ) are just brilliant.


I had brought the 1st season DVD set, and was watching an episode where we were introduced to Sheldons twin sister. She was tall, dark, and pretty, and predictably the other characters fancied her...


Now normally this wouldn't bother me! After all, most comedys have a pretty girl, where guys swoops to get into her good graces.


And for a while at least, the swooping wasn't too bad.


But then it got sickening. As the story progressed, the sister got far too much attention needed, and the usual date-asking game went on for too long...


... to the degree where each guy character took turns to knock on poor Pennys door, and asking the sister out... and all the while, the sister (politely, of course) said, 'No'


When it cam to Rajs turn, the poor guy didn't even speak (the character in the 1st season had trouble speaking to girls) and made a small wimper that excruciatingly lasted for a good minute (although it felt like more), before walking down the stairs. The sister took it in good spirits (mentioning something about a dog) and finally said goodbye to Sheldon. Then the episode ended.


I hated it! I hated the constant swooning, and (regretably) could relate to what some of the guys went through. Pretty women had power... and they knew it!


I remember a few of my earlier experiences, that guys would sometimes drool over women that had the looks, and the very thought disgusted me.


So much so, that for the next 5 hours, I was practically in a bad mood, going through emotional turmoil, before a thought hit me...


Why am I doing this?


This happens a lot. The producers are only trying to produce a comedy after all... Some people will like that stuff, and some people will hate it!


Not everyones taste are the same!


Then I thought about a comment made by Steve Pavlina on his site, about that fact that if you have an emotional reaction towards something, in nearly all cases, it means that a part of you sees that situation inside yourself.


Fast forward to William Burlmans tip for out-of-body exploration. "Confronting and dissolving the energy manifestations of my own fears, limits and blocks are essential for my spiritual growth"


What had happened, was what started out to be a good day (I had previously felt good before watching the episode) had turned bad, all because my soul showed me some, 'past programming' and I hadn't recognised it as such!


Even in good times, you will always see a manifestation of fear of some sort, and its primary reason is for you to simply, 'dissolve it'.


Why?


Because you are not thought... although you may use thought to create (in fact you do... )


You are not emotion... although you may use emotion to create (in fact you do, as emotion is, 'Energy in 'motion')


You are soul... unconditional love, unlimited creativity and infinite!


Period!


Therefore, you must always seek to dissolve any fear you have. Attack your fears... be relentless (if needs be).


Best way of attacking them... project unconditional love towards them!


Oliver Dodd is an expert in meditating and achieving peace using Chi, Theta and Delta meditation. If you would like to learn to meditate within 60 seconds and not only achieve peace of mind and spirit but also to manifest your goals in life, click here to begin! Providing quality counselling articles, hynotherapy writings and other mind help resources online.

Tuesday, 27 November 2012

Healing Your Life From the Inside Out, Breaking the Bubble of Illusion

Often when we think about healing ourselves, we first think about our emotional or mental self - then our physical body. We rush to a psychiatrist, or doctor - hoping for relief, a cure, or a fix for all of our problems... for a magical pill that will take it all a way. It is this "dis-ease" within ourselves that causes the turmoil in our outer world.


Physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually - if we are not okay with ourselves on the inside, we will manifest this into our external reality and we will probably not like the results.


The majority of us have created a bubble around us, protecting us from hurt and pain that we have experienced or from things we don't want to face. We pretend that we are happy with our life, our job, our spouse and the circumstances that surround us - when in fact, deep down we are wishing for something different.


When we are confronted about who we are, how we are, or about the problems that are clearly evident in our world - we just don't want to hear it. We get angry, we cry, we plug our ears and we say LALALALALALALA... "I can't hear you". We protect the bubble as if it is who we are, as if our safety, sanity and sanctity depends on it. There is no way we can allow anyone to burst our bubble and if for some reason they do, we feel exposed and vulnerable.


The truth is that those feelings are always there, we've just become so good at living in our bubble that they aren't noticed by us most of the time. When these feelings do "pop up" and become a problem, we sometimes attempt to cover them with alcohol or drugs - or any addiction that helps us avoid them.


The biggest problem with this type of behaviour (besides risk to our health) is that we are denying the very essence of who we are - we are suffocating ourselves with our painful experiences, instead of facing them. We refuse to let go of all the hate, anger and sadness that sits inside of us, and this is what is killing us! We need to let go of all the negativity and begin to forgive those who have hurt us - and more importantly we need to forgive ourselves.


I guess the reason I can write about this with such knowledge is because I have been living in a bubble for many years now. I have been denying who I really am at the core of my being because I wanted to protect her. It is in this protecting of myself that I have completely lost touch with that part of me, I have lost touch with the people around me and subsequently I have allowed someone else to live my life for me. I have been denying what I really want, and need because I haven't been present to get what the deepest part of my being really needs. And that is Love.


We have to learn love ourselves, completely and honestly - despite everything that we have experienced. We are worthy of love! Why am I so sure you ask? Because we are made from this Love. Some Great Force that sits in the very centre of all of us, created everything that we could ever need from an Unconditional, Unbiased Love. This Love is Ours, but we will never experience it while we are denying the very truth of who we are, while we are trapped in the very bubble that we have created in order to keep us safe.


We can not heal until we know who we truly are; and that is the person that is past all of the pain, experiences, labels and ideas of who we are that are limiting to our being. It's time to burst the Bubble of Illusion and heal our lives!


The most important thing to remember, in all of this, is that the world is your mirror - you must begin to heal your true self before you will see a change in the external world around you; this includes any physical, mental or emotional problems you are experiencing.


To begin healing, you will need to know where to start. Healing the Self is more than a way of healing, it is an incredible journey of self-exploration and discovery! You will also find many other great healing resources available at OneWorldHealing.net that can help you on your journey! Providing quality counselling articles, hynotherapy writings and other mind help resources online.

Saturday, 24 November 2012

7 Activities to Help Reduce Your Stress

So many of us are on an epic journey to seek a variety of tools for quick stress reduction. Finding and sustaining some level of inner peace and harmony on a daily basis seems to be more challenging everyday. Many of these stressors we create; others are imposed upon us. We work too many hours, even on the weekend. We're constantly checking our emails, text messages, social media accounts and voice-mails. We stress out about our finances. We stress out about our work loads. We stress out about the future, forgetting to stay in the moment. Keep in mind, the media is not in the business of making you feel good. Likewise, friends, family, co-workers or business partners who feed on drama and the misfortune of others contribute additional stress and disharmony to your life; it can be very difficult to get away from it.


The good news is there things we can do to minimize the impact of daily stresses on our minds, bodies and spirits and when done continuously, really does work. This stuff is probably already things that you know about, however, if you don't employ them, what good are they going to do for you? Remember that wherever you go, there you are and so is your stress. It's very difficult to enjoy the moment of wherever you are if you're so highly agitated that you're unable to do so. You have to be able to get your head above water to take a breath. When you're bunched emotionally, making clear-headed decisions become challenging to impossible. What follows are 7 simple activities in which each are powerful in their own right.


1. Gentle Deep Breathing. When we are emotionally triggered in unpleasant ways, which is more often than not, we tend to hold our breath, effectively locking the breath and the emotion, up in our body. This causes toxicity and is the root cause of most dis-ease and illness. Your very life depends on your willingness to breathe with awareness and use all of your lung capacity. Conscious breathing refocuses your attention from the outer world to your inner world, reducing tension and stress. Several effective calming breathing techniques include alternate nostril breathing, left nostril breathing, the 4-7-8 count breath and deep breathing in the yogic corpse position. Do your due diligence and research before attempting.


2. Ground. Grounding is as essential as breathing. This activity keeps you energetically rooted to the earth, which is important when you feel overwhelmed and for many of us, this is an everyday occurrence. Grounding can help you feel "solid", strong and resolved. When you forget to ground, you may feel as you're being tossed around like some tiny rowboat at sea during a typhoon. Get bruised enough and you'll start to remember to anchor yourself. There are a number of ways to ground, but here's a quick one for you to do: (Do not do this while driving) Get somewhere quiet and close your eyes. Breathe deeply several times in through your nose and out through your mouth. Imagine a huge column of white light coming in through the top of your head and down through your body, out the bottom of your feet and into the earth. Do this for several breaths. Next, imagine a great tree: your legs are the trunk and they go deep into the earth. Do this for several more breaths. Continue the imagery and breathing until you feel calmer and more relaxed.


3. Shake or dance. You can either do this in public or in private just as long as you move. Energy is active, kinetic and requires movement. When we are feeling heavy and stagnant it is because our bodies are telling us it has too many energy blocks and it needs to move. Move freely and unrestricted, allowing your body to express full-range of motion. Make sure you breathe while you're doing this. Have fun! This activity disperses stagnant energy, wakes up the body and dissolves tension.


4. Listen to soothing music, chimes, singing bowls or running water. Some people relax through sound and vibration. When our fight or flight centers get activated through stress, which unfortunately for most of us is chronic, we have a hard time coming down and getting rid of the excess energy. These sounds can help to reduce the agitation of the sympathetic nervous system, which when activated by stress, releases adrenaline and lactic acid into the body; this is no bueno, especially when done over a long period of time. Listen to one or more of these sounds and breathe deeply at the same time. In through your nose and out through your mouth. Just listening to these sounds can have a profound effect on your emotions and your central nervous system. My favorite relaxing sound: listening to the sound of a rain storm.


5. Scream. Sounds simple enough right? Screaming can be a powerful eliminator of tension. However, DO NOT DO THESE WHILE DRIVING. You might actually pass out from the temporary increase in your blood pressure, especially if it's already high from stress. Screaming out your frustrations gives you an opportunity to again, kinetically move that stuck energy and give your voice when you can't say what you want. Another technique that works very well is called "HA" breathing. If screaming doesn't appeal to you, forcefully breathe out while saying "HA!" Breathe in through your nose and HA through your mouth.


6. Cry. This is one of the most underused forms of releasing stress. Crying is mistakenly seen as a form of weakness. Crying has a very powerful effect on the body as it releases extra stress hormones from the body and helps the body dump toxins associated with holding on to anger and frustration. When you have one of those days when it all just becomes too much, instead of engaging in a numbing activity that involves eating junk, drinking alcohol or taking some kind of drug, which just shoves it down further until it comes back in the form of an illness or disease, just find a quiet place where you can be alone and just have a good cry. You'll feel a whole lot better when you're done.


7. Herbal teas. There are several herbal teas out there that are well-known for having a sedative effect on the CNS and lowering stress, which can affect the quality of our sleep, a key component for reducing stress: getting enough sleep. Chamomile and Lavender tea, which can both be steeped directly from the flowers and seeds, are excellent at soothing the nervous system. Ginseng tea is another great herb which clears away that bunched feeling that comes from mental exhaustion and insomnia. You can also try Valerian, which is another great tea for helping you get to sleep and we all know that a lack of proper sleep just adds to our stress levels.


These are just a few suggestions that can be applied just about anywhere and at anytime. Most of them are free; herbal tea does not cost very much, little goes a long way and it can be carried with you anywhere where you can get hot water.


Long-term chronic stress has, unfortunately, become a way of life for most of us and we have an obligation to ourselves to find ways to reduce or even eliminate it. People have made radical changes to their lives in order to regain control of a life that has gone rogue because of stress.


When used regularly, these grounding and centering activities will have positive, far-reaching effects on your body, mind and spirit.


Charyn is co-owner of Gurl Know, a resource site for the Community of Women who want to live and love better in their lives. gurlknow.com. Providing quality counselling articles, hynotherapy writings and other mind help resources online.

Wednesday, 21 November 2012

Three Costly Mistakes Preventing Your Peace of Mind

Mistake #1 - Your body and mind are separate. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.


It's been said that "You may fool yourself some of the time. You may fool others some of the time. But, you can never fool your body. It is the most sensitive barometer of your inner world." And, both are inter-connected. "What tones and calms one, soothes and improves the other."


Your behaviour is actually creating worldly and psychic frameworks that future humanity and your descendants will inhabit.


Solution - Choose your acts and thoughts very wisely. Life responds to wise attention in remarkable ways! A body scan is a good way to begin to live mindfully. Your mind has a direct impact on your body. What inhabits your body? Your mind. If the mind is tense, and disconnected, the body will match. Doing a body scan is a simple technique that helps you to energetically wake up your body-mind connection.


Mistake #2 - Your Thinking Mind. I know it sounds silly but most people's thinking is automatic, repetitive and involuntary. You don't think. Thinking happens to you. The voice in the head has a mind of its own, and unfortunately most people are at the mercy of that voice. Your mind picks up all kinds of things from earlier in the day and "replays" it endlessly, or it's restless and can't stop running around. These are all very powerful internal states and your mind gets attached to this conditioned way of thinking. Your mind wants attention right now!


Solution: Get out of your head! Let go of the stories. Free your mind by sitting quietly. Try paying attention to your breathing. This not only changes the direction of your focus, but it also helps in not strengthening your wayward thoughts.


Mistake #3 - Your Ego. Yikes! This is a big one. For thousands of years humanity has become mind-possessed. Because we have become so identified through our mind, a false sense of ourself came into being - the ego. And there's even more to this.


Another dimension of the ego is emotion. Emotion turns into ego when you identify with them; that is to say when they become "I" takes over.


Explained a different way, let's say that you see two of your friends over in the corner having a quiet conversation. Your mind observes this and then begins to chatter away. Saying things like "I bet they're over there talking about me." Or, "I just know that they're talking about what happened today at the gym." You have not only become emotional, but the situation becomes about you.


Solution - How do you get a handle on this? You need to let go of the story and return to the only place of power. The Present Moment. You hang onto your stories because it strengthens your identity. But, nothing ever happened in the past that can prevent you from being Present Now. And, if the past can't prevent you from being Present Now, what power does it have? Again, become quiet in your body and allow your mind to become still so it can see what is really there. This is called having a mindful experience.


Here's what I have for you. Visit me at calmtoday.com. You can catch the free online webcast to see for yourself how easy this can be. (Come on, you know you can do this!) Invest in yourself. You're worth it! Providing quality counselling articles, hynotherapy writings and other mind help resources online.